The teacher becomes the student

Over the last four months, we have been pursuing Early Intervention Services for Benny.  It started with a suspicion raised after a playdate with a couple of above-average talkers.  It lead us into the world of case management, only this time, from a client's perspective.  From there, we've been linked to different therapists for evaluations.  Ultimately, he was referred for speech therapy, and after a bumpy start with a less-than-stellar professional, we've met our person.  Her name is Karen.  She is magical.  Like, rides a unicorn to work and performs miracles-type magical.  She is Ben's speech-language pathologist and over the last month, has gotten more progress out of Ben than we were able to all summer long.  Maybe it has less to do with the unicorn and more to do with the advanced degree, but nonetheless, we are keeping her.

Ben started therapy about a month ago.  It's a strange feeling to observe a session between a client and a therapist as the mother.  I don't go back to the office to type a note about it.  I don't file the claim, and I don't meet with my supervisor about it.  I observe my son, and his proverbial wheels turning as he figures out the task at hand.  I have an amazing sense of pride when I see the activity click and hear a new word come out of his mouth.  Even if it's just an approximation, it's magic.  And a much different feeling from the frustration I've carried for months now.  And I see it in Ben too.  I see the weight slowly lifting from his shoulders every time he learns something new.  And when Karen rides off into the sunset on her unicorn, he and I are communicating just a little bit easier than we did the day before.

We're probably in the 30 word vocabulary range.  Up from about 7 or 8 words in July.  Including signs.  He is willing to try most new sounds and one or two syllable words.  And since therapy started, he's even started some spontaneous conversation.  Meaning, he'll initiate by observing something in his environment and saying it out loud.  Something we completely skipped at around 12 months when he should have been pointing at things, but wasn't.  A point, at anything, whether it be a plane in the sky or a cookie he wants, counts as a "word".  The pointing thing never came together for Ben, and he seems to be skipping over it completely.  Instead, he names the item he observes.  Most notably, "Ti-ti" (any cat, squirrel, or small mammal) and "ball" which refers to anything sphere shaped.  For example, the sun is a ball, and an egg is a ball.  I'll take the overgeneralizations, we're labeling things!  Another super cute generalization he's made is toward food.  When he sees a fast food sign, or a commercial for anything food related, he says "Mmm, yum" in a very matter-of-fact way.  Today, while driving to the friendly neighborhood McDonald's, he spontaneously said "Happy!".  I'm guessing this is in reference to a Happy Meal.  Or how he felt about the situation.  Either way, it was completely awesome.  A seemingly mundane detail that makes me as proud as if he had won the Nobel Peace Prize, because I know where we started just a few months ago.

We've been working hard on the alphabet.  He digs the song.  Most of his musical toys sing it.  Not sure what the alphabet has to do with his Fisher Price barn, but whatever.  It's not a new one for him.  Coincidentally, he has lots of farm-themed toys.  So Old MacDonald is also pretty familiar.  When we run through the alphabet, letter for letter, he's pretty awesome at it.  As in, "Say A!" "Say B!" etc.  He'll go "Aaaaaaaa, Beeeeeeee" and be so proud.  And when his favorite game show, Wheel of Fortune is on, he will gladly help the contestants.  "I'll take an R, Pat!"  "Aurrrrrrrr!".  Pretty cute.  When we sing Old MacDonald had a farm, he supplies the "E-I-E-I-O" although it's more like "di-I-di-I-YO!".  But when we sing the alphabet and I give him the "A-B-C-D" and try to get him to finish, he adds the "di-I-di-I-YO!" and claps for himself.  It's adorable.  Incorrect, but adorable!

Related to that, he's been really into singing.  He's always been a dancer, but has recently added the song part to his performance.  He sings the Yo Gabba Gabba songs while he dances them, and is a major Justin Bieber fan.  Our friend Justin won several awards on the AMA's the other night, and Ben, aka, Justin's biggest fan, couldn't have been more thrilled.  While Justin approached the stage to accept award after award, they played his super annoying hit, "Baby", which prompted Ben to booty dance and go "baby baby baby OHHHH!" over and over again.  And all of this super cute behavior wasn't even on the map a month ago.

Can you tell I'm a proud Mama?  I used to reject praise when people would tell me how amazing I am for "teaching" people activities of daily living and other basic skills.  I still maintain that they were teaching me WAY more than I could ever teach them.  And here I am, years later, learning life lessons from a 2 year old.  MY 2 year old.  I'm in awe at his progress and determination, hopeful for his future, and a tiny bit more understanding of what other mamas like me have gone through.  Thanks to Ben, his support team, and a lovely lady that rides a unicorn.

Two years and counting...

Two years ago today, I met Ben.  I'm not gonna lie, I was really drugged up.  But the one memory that stands out from that day was the overwhelming feeling of love I had for that beautiful baby boy.  8 pounds and 11 ounces of pure perfection.  In some ways I feel like I blinked and was teleported to his 2nd birthday party, and in other ways, I feel like he's always been here.  He's my little buddy, and I can't believe he's two!

To back up, the last 6 weeks have been lots of fun, and full of transitions.  Ben welcomed his baby brother, Beckett into the family, and has changed his mind on how he feels about him a few times.  I think he's finally settled into the idea of having a baby brother, and has even been sweet with him a time or two.  Though these moments are short lived, I'm happy to witness the beginnings of a hopefully awesome relationship.  Ben has been so sweet and wonderful through the transition.  He continues to amaze me every day with his unbelievable patience and independence.  For being so young, he has done such an awesome job at handling the fact that Mama's attention is suddenly split between two babies.  And sometimes one demands more than the other.  I've been incredibly lucky in that respect.

Ben admires his little brother in a wagon:

Exhausted, but sticking it out:

Minutes later, calm and cool:

Giving hugs to an unsuspecting napper:

We haven't done too much in the last few weeks.  Having a newborn in the house makes travel, even to the grocery store, nearly impossible.  We've done a lot of cartoon watching, playing with toys, and keeping Beckett quiet and happy.  He's benefited from tons of visits from Grammie and Grandpa over the weeks, and has even visited with Auntie M a couple times.  This has been a real treat, and he's always sad to see them go.  He's developed a habit of blocking the door from his visitors leaving if he really disagrees with their departures.  But will always see his guests out and will say goodbye properly with either the traditional "buh-bye" or his newest send-off, "Bahhhh!".  He picked that one up from his more southern family members. We traveled to the mountain house for a weekend in early October to celebrate Aunt Nette's birthday and to share Beckett with family.  Ben enjoyed playing with his Mimi and aunties, and was happy to get back up there after being away for a couple months.  

He also got the surprise of his life and traveled to Charlotte to see Yo Gabba Gabba live and schmooze with the cast members after the show!  He was in such shock, he couldn't even smile through the show.  He just stood there, wide-eyed and with his mouth half open.  Afterward, he sat in a small circle, just a few feet away from DJ Lance Rock as he read them a story, and got to meet all the Gabbas including his favorite, Foofa.  She blew him a kiss and he smiled from ear to ear.  It was awesome!   

The magical moment:

Close to home, he's enjoyed a few trips to the local parks and even went on a hike with Mama and Daddy a couple weekends ago.  He rode in his carrier for the first time in months, and seemed to enjoy hitching a hands-free ride through the forest.  

A hike through Bent Creek Experimental Forest:

We've seen lots of new development from Ben over the last few months.  Physically, he's hit a growth spurt and put on a pound and an inch or two.  He's still wearing most of the clothes he wore this time last year (bonus for us, we get to reuse his winter clothes!), but we've added some bigger sizes with the hope that he'll grow into them before the season is through.  He's also really blossomed socially.  He is definitely more eager to play with others, and has ditched parallel play for more interactive fun.  Levi has been over a time or two, and they've met in various places for playtime which has been so good for Ben.  Not only does he love to see his best friend, but he learns a lot when they are together.  And Levi is so patient and sweet with Ben.  They truly have a special relationship.  Ben's verbal communication is really taking off.  His vocabulary is now more like 20 or 30 words, and he is usually willing to try new words.  Sometimes he'll even try a two-word sequence, which is brand new and really impressive!  And his Mimi worked hard on teaching him gesturing.  This is a developmental milestone that he pretty much skipped a year ago, and is apparently an important one.  So we've really encouraged him to point out things like body parts, pictures in books, etc.  And he does this very willingly now.  We still haven't started with speech therapy, but this should be coming together in the next few weeks.  In the meantime, we're working hard at home, and watching his expressive communication blossom.

So back to his birthday celebrations.  Ben's birthday weekend fell on Halloween again.  So being half thrifty and half lazy, we decided to throw another Halloween-themed birthday party for him.  The night before his party, we all went to downtown Hendersonville for a bit of trick-or-treating and a dance party.   We even coached him on saying "trick or treat", which he rehearsed pretty well, but forgot to say every time he presented his bag for some candy.  Ben dressed up as his hero, DJ Lance Rock.

Ben as DJ Lance and Beckett as a little calf - downtown Hendersonville:

The next afternoon, we had a very small celebration at our house attended by just family and our besties.  It was small but fun, and Ben ended up with lots of cool presents and a nice stash to put away for his college fund.  He partied hard, ate way too much candy and junk food, and squirmed at cake time again.  He did, however, eat a slice of cake with icing.

Ben and a little help from his friends:

Today was his actual birthday.  We hung out around the house and detoxed from the weekend's festivities.  He played with the toys he scored yesterday, watched his new DVDs, and hung out with Grammie and Grandpa for most of the afternoon.  Tonight, we went to Cracker Barrel for dinner and Ben had a big birthday pancake.  He didn't even melt down at the restaurant like he's been known to do. We came home and ate more birthday cake, icing and all, and had a really nice day.  For me, it's been a day of reflection over the last two years.  It didn't hit me when Ben turned 1 that he wasn't a baby anymore.  It's hit me hard tonight.  Maybe because I have a newborn in the house, and can look at him and clearly remember Ben at that age like it was yesterday.  He is such an amazing little guy, and we've had so much fun over the last two years.  Looking forward to many, many more!

Adventures of a Big Brother

Dear Ben,

Congratulations, Boo Bear - you are officially a BIG brother!  The 40 (37) week countdown is over, and now a new adventure starts: brotherhood.  You have been such a trooper all year long, putting up with a sick Mommy, a cranky Mommy, and a very big version of Mommy throughout the months.  You've never protested when Cheerios were presented as breakfast 13 days in a row, or dinner consisted of cheese and crackers because Mommy couldn't pull it together enough to prepare something appropriate.  You've played quietly and independently when Mommy was too big to get on the floor with you, and slept in most mornings as if you knew you were giving a precious gift.  I am so thankful for these things, baby - thank you for being patient with me.

Throughout the months, you've come to understand what was happening.  At first, though understandably, you had no idea what was happening.  We told you about your little brother before my belly told the world.  As your brother grew, you became curious.  We named Beckett around the time that my pants changed to the kind with elastic waistbands, so you've been familiar with his name for awhile.  We referred to the belly as "baby" and "brother" and it seemed that sometime in the 8th month, the idea clicked for you.  You hugged my belly every morning, and kissed it goodnight before bed.  When I asked you "Where's Beckett?", you'd lift your shirt and pat your own belly first before patting mine gently and sweetly.  You loved him before you even met him.

Our last day together as a twosome - me and you - was uneventful but wonderful.  I wasn't feeling particularly hot, so I layed in bed most of the day.  Neither of us knew it would be our last day, just me and you, but we spent it cuddling in bed and taking it easy.  You took a 4 hour nap that day.  In fact, I had to wake you up to get you ready for Grandpa before I headed to the hospital.  Once I learned that Beckett would be coming, you came to visit me in the hospital.  You saw me laying in my hospital bed, hooked up to monitors and getting prepped for surgery and smirked at me, almost knowingly.  You even laughed a few times when you approached my bed.  I swear you knew what was happening. 

You've been such a good big brother since you and Beckett officially met on Saturday.  You came into the hospital room with your Aunt Madi and locked eyes on him, and then proceeded to ignore him for the rest of the visit.  We considered this a success, because you pretty much acted like nothing was different.  The next day, you even crawled up next to him and gave him a hug.  You've been really good since we've all been home together, and while it's obvious you know that something is permanently different, you've transitioned really, really well.  We're so proud of you.

You don't know it yet, but your brother is the most awesome gift we could have ever given you.  You and he are 22 months apart.  You're going to share your room, your toys and your friends with him, and both of you will have a best friend for life.  It doesn't seem like it right now, I know, but these are all good things. 

Thank you so much for being so BIG.  You are going to be the best big brother ever.  My heart has grown big enough to fit both of you in it neatly, but always know that you are extra special because you are my first born. And ultimately the reason that the event of welcoming your little brother into the world has been so easy.  I love you, Boo.

Love, Mama

Summer of Ben - Two Thousand Ten

August 2010: Bubble watch at the beach house

The return from our annual beach trip means that summer is almost through.  The end of the summer means we're closer to harvest.  Harvest, at least in Henderson County, means the apple trees are picked and the corn fields are plowed.  It also means that the little boy pictured above is that much closer to being redefined as a "big brother".  Good things are on the horizon.

Ocean Isle was a big hit with Ben again this year.  Every August, Mimi's side of the family packs their sport utility vehicles full of household items, food and beach supplies and participate in this trip. We travel from all four corners of North Carolina to a house on stilts in the middle of the island.  Traveling from as far as the North Carolina mountains to as close as a 45 minute drive within the county (and everywhere inbetween), we hang out, reconnect and worship the sun for seven days.  After spending our final year in a beautiful five bedroom house last year, the family opted for a bigger place.  Six in one bedroom was cute and everything, but we're not getting any smaller here.  So this year, we hung out in style, in an eight bedroom home with four flights of stairs, an elevator, and a neat view of the ocean. Unfortunately, Ben and I represented the Hendersonville Turners alone this year.  Someone has to earn the paychecks around here, so Jacob volunteered.  At our last visit, Ben was nine months old.  This year, he was 21 months.  Definitely more aware of his surroundings and more responsive to his relatives, Ben really seemed to enjoy the extra attention, homecooked southern meals, and play time outside.  Things he did not enjoy were severely interrupted sleep schedules, the ocean, and the inability to brush sand off his hands.  He spent most of the day playing indoors with his cousin Adam while his very pregnant mommy avoided direct UV rays.  He and Adam bonded over a dump truck and a pile of legos.  Ben very sweetly shared his toys with Adam but was also a very overbearing project manager regarding how Adam played with said toys.  But overall, a success.  Ben traveled to the ocean three times during his visit and hated it every time.  He was good for about 20 minutes before having an epic meltdown, throwing himself into the sand and demanding that we leave.  The most we ever got out of him was probably 90 minutes.  But we can at least claim he was there.

At the shore and almost enjoying it while Poo fills his bucket:

Cooling off in the pool:

Chasing bubbles with Adam:

Ben also enjoyed a couple of trips to Calabash for seafood night.  He remembered his love of hush puppies and ate them by the basketful, but did not have the same affinity for fried shrimp.  He did, however, enjoy stuffed flounder, which is a fabulously filling combination of flounder and breaded crabmeat.  Between that, the endless hush puppy baskets, and Mommy's phone equipped with Yo Gabba Gabba episodes, Ben was perfectly content.  He even got to check out the dock behind the restaurants afterward.

Rocking the Dockside tie-dye t-shirt in front of his shrimp boat:

Other fun happenings included a trip to the Ocean Isle museum to be educated and escape the heat.  Ben, his grandparents, aunts, cousin and Mama all spent a couple hours checking out exhibits at the museum.  The adults definitely learned more than the babies, but fun was had by all.

Checking out the wildlife exhibit, or as Ben calls all furry animals, the Titi exhibit:

After a week of family and sunshine, Ben and Mama returned to the mountains.  Only to head down our mountain and back up the Avery County mountain for Mimi's birthday celebration.  And then back to Henderson County for the rest of the summer.  We're traveled out.  And now in nesting mode, cleaning excessively and waiting for our newest family member to make his appearance.  In related news, our family has welcomed another little cousin in the first week of August.  Technically due at the end of July, Ella Katherine was fashionably late and welcomed by her parents, Elizabeth and Blair in Raleigh.  We still haven't met her yet, but the pictures are precious.  Because we are traveled out (and ordered by the doctor to stay close to home), it may be the holidays before we lay eyes on this little pink bundle, but it will be worth the wait!

At the end of July, I left my full-time job to be an official stay at home mom and complete another "gestation vacation".  It's been amazing to wake up with Benny every morning, fix all of his meals, and play trucks on command.  He loves it too.  We've had lots of fun bonding and spending all the time we can together, just me and him, before our family expands.  It seems like he's beginning to get what's happening.  As the belly grows, he's taken more notice of it and pats his own belly when he sees me patting mine.  When I ask "Where is the baby?" he first pats his belly, and then pats mine, trying to lift up my shirt so he can see my belly button real quick before covering it up again.  He loves his baby brother and will hug the belly when he's just hanging out with me on the couch.  Hopefully his attitude stays the same when the baby is on the outside, but I don't anticipate it being that easy.  This is the same child who freaks out if a cat is in my lap when he would rather be there.  And by freak out, I mean full-throttle, epic meltdown complete with glass-shattering screams and headbanging.  Every time I think we've arrived in the "terrible twos" early, he kicks things up a notch and shows me what true toddler behavior can consist of.  Meltdowns are no longer quick, dirty and to the point.  They can last for hours, and walking out of the room doesn't solve the problem anymore.  He will just scoop his pitiful self off the floor and follow me where ever I go, wailing and shuffling his little feet like the saddest boy who ever lived.  And this can be for reasons including me refusing to pick him up and carry him all day. Or his truck wheel getting caught up in the rug edge, requiring a different maneuver to navigate it.  Or Spongebob going to commercial.  You know, really serious situations. 

But on a more positive note, his sweetness is also developing, melting the hearts of everyone around him.  In explaining Ben's emotions to someone recently, I described him as picking a feeling and REALLY committing to it.  When he feels something, he feels it at 100% and expresses it accordingly.  Ben is the best hug and kiss giver of all time and will do both on command.  His cuddle times are rare because he is a very busy boy, but when he crawls onto the couch and snuggles, it is the best snuggle ever.  The love he has for his cat is endless and sort of surprising.  I've never really seen a toddler care about a cat before.  Cats aren't the most friendly creatures to walk the planet.  Generally speaking, anyway.  But Ben and Toby have a love that can't be comprehended.  Toby greets Ben every morning when he wakes up by standing on his hind legs and rubbing Ben's head with his own.  And Ben smiles from ear to ear and greets him by saying "Titi!".  Sometimes, he'll even wake up in his crib and call "Titi" instead of "Mama".  His newest phrase is "Hi Ti?" which seems to be the way he calls his cat.  He'll walk around the house and say very sweetly in a high pitched voice "Hi Ti?" until Toby answers him.  And he always does.  Ben is very gentle with cats and pets them sweetly and carefully, if they'll let him.  And very few will.  But Toby is a good sport. 

Ben's playfulness and confidence is also starting to develop.  Better late than never.  My child has always been very cautious and the ultimate spectator when it comes to perceived danger or activity in general.  A genetic trait that I'm afraid I've passed down.  But recently he's become more trusting of the "throw Ben in the air" game and will approach certain family members to be tossed around.  He'll also get in the middle of a group of kids and play alongside them, whereas before he would just stand on the sidelines and laugh from a distance.  We recently got a membership at Hendersonville's children's museum, called Hands-On.  It's a neat little place with community sponsored stations that have different themes, stimulating different senses and evoking creativity.  He loves it and takes me at least twice a week.  As soon as we get there, he takes off running, after a group of kids or into the Legoland where he can build towers to knock over.  It's been a great outlet for him and an even better way to keep him entertained when his own legos and dump trucks just aren't cutting it.

In other news, Ben is about to start a new journey in his life.  The quest for verbal communication.  We finally mentioned our concerns about a suspected speech delay.  At 21 months, Ben's vocabulary consists of less than 10 words.  And most of those are pronounced incorrectly.  After discussing this at length with his doctor, we were given a referral to Early Childhood Intervention.  And the referral led to a formal evaluation.  The speech therapist observed Ben carefully for a few hours, asked me tons of questions and determined that Ben is in need of speech therapy.  Twice a week.  For an undetermined, yet prolonged period of time.  She even threw out a "suspected diagnosis": Childhood Apraxia of Speech.  This is the fancy way of saying that Ben has verbal planning difficulty and understands exactly what is being said to him, but has trouble mapping out the word in a meaningful way to repeat it back.  It seems to be a neurological condition, not much unlike stuttering and can be corrected with good outcomes if it is caught early.  So our suspicions were right.  And now we finally get to bridge the gap and work on acquiring some speech to go with the many signs he's picked up this summer.  We look forward to working on the therapy as a family and are excited to see Ben jump this hurdle to be a better communicator.

So that's been our life in the last 6 weeks.  We're still in the heat of the summer, but can see the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel.  The news says this has been the hottest summer on record for us North Carolinians.  We look forward to cooler days.  And fresh from the orchard Honey Crisp apples.  And a new Turner to join us.  Another milestone on the way for Ben, as he goes from only child to big brother!

The Adventures of Benjamin Boo Bear take a nosedive

My mom said to me about a month ago - "How are you going to explain to Ben that you quit taking pictures of him and stopped blogging when he turned 1 year old?"  Ben, I have no acceptable explanation. I have been a terrible family historian this year.  I have lots of excuses - like my iMac (where my pictures are stored) has been in an uncomfortable location, or my head was in a toilet for a couple months, but it's not acceptable.  Sorry Ben.  Mama's gonna try to do better.  The adventures have continued, however, unrecorded until now.

So back to my head in the toilet thing.  Ben found out in mid-January that he'll have a roommate this fall!  Benjamin is about to be a big brother!  And I have to brag on him lots here - he has been a dream toddler throughout the gestation process thus far.  It's like the child has a 6th sense about my new condition because he has truly given me a break while I battle the various stages of pregnancy.  Ladies and gentlemen, it is a much different process when you have a 1 year old running around.  The conception of this baby and Ben's walking happened in the same week.  I kid you not.  So step aside, morning sickness, Ben sees a cabinet with bleach and bug killer he can get into and he's headed right for it.  But mostly, he's been great.  I still benefit from 2 long naptimes from him per day, at roughly 2 hours a piece.  AND he still sleeps till 10 am most mornings if I let him do it.  Naps have been my biggest benefit of his generosity.  I love sleep.  I crave it.  Especially when I am growing a child.  Apparently my son celebrates them as much as I do.  So when Mama needs to recharge, playtime is over and Ben gets serenaded by a musical seahorse until he finds himself recharging.  Perfect.  The walking thing was initially a little stressful, considering the timing, but ended up fine.  Ben rarely gets into anything dangerous, especially now that we have childproof locks on all the cabinets.  But another unintentionally terrible behavior also coincided with my first trimester that I could have lived without, considering I was on medication to reduce the head-in-the-toilet phenomenon: sharing food.  No baby, Mama doesn't want to eat an Xtreme Cheddar Blast Goldfish with you.  But thank you for thinking of me.  Luckily, all of that is behind me.  Well, the nausea part anyway.

Ben is getting a little brother in late September/early October.  We are so excited that we get to raise two boys, two years apart and dream about the buddies they'll become, the trouble they'll get into, and the fun we'll all have.  I explain all of this to Ben on a regular basis but it's not really clicking yet.  You know, because he's 1.

So back to the adventures.  We kicked off spring as quickly as possible - which for us started in mid-March when the snow finally melted.  Still not enjoying spring temperatures, but the white stuff was tucked away under trees and in the shade and easily avoidable at that point.  We did a lot of park trips in March.

Early March in our backyard - no grilling anytime soon!

Later in March - upset because we have to play on the playground in 40 degrees

The last weekend in March, Ben and I traveled to Hartsville, South Carolina for the annual Carolina Cup weekend.  Jacob and I have been going to this event since we started dating - our first cup was in 2004.  In 2010, we traveled Jacob-less, because he had to work, but it was the first year Benny actually got to see the races!  Last year he was ready to go with his little outfit and everything, but we were rained out.  So Ben had a blast, naturally.  He walked around the in-field with various family members, mostly Mimi and Aunt Nette, and crashed frat boy and fancy southerners' parties with his charm and good looks.  He also enjoyed watching the horsies clip-clop by him (there were horses at this thing?!) and he even won a race he may have bet on.  $14.00 richer, right into his piggy bank!

The outfit - half the fun: March 2010

Proud to call these fancy dressers my Aunties:

We all headed to Aunt Nette's farm the next day to have fun in the sun and to throw Aunt Elizabeth and Aunt Lauren a baby shower and wedding shower, respectively.  This was the first not-cold day on record in 2010, so was thoroughly enjoyed by all.  Ben was pretty tuckered out by then, as was Mommy, because both of our nap schedules were pretty screwed up by this point, but sunshine and family were bonuses.  Ben played with his aunts, uncles and cousins, and even got to play with his cousin, baby Adam a little.  An overall successful trip!

Cousins and Aunts at the farm:

The next month brought more sniffles, as Ben changed schools and became Episcopalian.  He had to leave our favorite school, Mud Creek for better hours, so began attending the St. James School for Little Folks.  And germs.  So April was sort of a bummer, filled with doctor visits and more prescription medication.  But in the middle of all that, the sickness left long enough for Ben to have a decent Easter weekend.  He celebrated with his first Easter Egg Hunt at the Arrowood's home.  He played with his buddy Levi and future girlfriend, Madison, but eventually got fed up and threw the tantrum of 2010 for all the party-goers to see.  Ben is capable of some serious attitude when he feels like it, and pretty much came out of the womb that way, but can usually shake it off pretty easily.  He's like his Mama - Hurricane Lindsay.  Meltdowns are fierce and angry for a pretty short period of time, and then calm sets in and order is restored fairly easily.  But no, this was not on the schedule today.  Ben's epic meltdown didn't end until 20 minutes after we GOT HOME.  And The Arrowoods don't live around the corner.  But moments leading up to that were pretty pleasant.

Levi and Ben: Easter bros

May and June have been fun filled with lots of local activities.  Ben helped me garden nearly every weekend to make our yard look more like people live here and less like an abandoned home.  He's become very fond of playing in the yard, by himself or with his doggies, and helps me water the plants every afternoon.  Ben and I traveled to the mountain house one weekend for more Turner family fun.  He's made lots of visits to see Grammie and Grandpa and has become especially fond of his Grandpa.  He loves to sit in his lap and hear him tell stories and encourage him to pet his "feathers" (beard).  Ben thinks this is hilarious and will mimic him by petting himself on the head, since his beard still hasn't come in.  He visited Hendersonville's Garden Jubilee festival just long enough to throw 80 pieces of gum in the street and scream loud enough to make other visitors uncomfortable (Hurricane Benjamin).  He visited the Nature Center with Lena and Levi and hung out at their house some for a quiet play date.

Bending it like Beckham with Levi:

Being comforted after a fall:

Getting Grandpa time at Mommy's birthday party:

Today, Ben got to visit Patton Pool in Hendersonville for the first time all season.  Ben is not a fan of pool water.  He will splash and play in the bathtub as long as you'll let him, but good luck dragging him into a pool.  The pool's temperature was 86 degrees today, because it has been at least 300 degrees every day for the last 3 weeks (did I mention we missed spring and jumped right into summer?).  So the pool felt very much like a bathtub today.  But it took about an hour and a lot of singing, dancing and being generally ridiculous in public to get Ben to smile.  But he eventually liked it.  Hopefully more visits are in our future, because unlike Ben, I very much enjoy floating in a pool.  When your belly is so big it deserves its own zip code, weightlessness in a pool, urine-filled or not, is a very pleasurable experience. 

Ben and Dad on Father's Day: about to enjoy (or not enjoy) a day at the pool

 

Milestones are fast and furious at this stage.  My little hamster is 19 months old, which means he is almost 2, and I'm having a hard time digesting that.  In the last few months, Ben has become mobile, and the whole world has opened up to him.  He's gone from wanting to be carried to having an intense need to do it himself.  This is the cause of Hurricane Benjamin most of the time.  He would like to walk to his destination, but oftentimes his destination is different than Mom and Dad's.  He likes to wander, and hates holding hands and being guided.  I broke down recently and did the unthinkable - I bought him a monkey backpack equipped with a leash.  I used to judge parents who put their kids on leashes to go into Target.  Now I consider them geniuses.  We haven't used it in public yet, but he loves wearing his monkey backpack around the house.  Speaking of monkeys, Ben has decided he is one.  Unfortunately, his falling and landing on his feet skills are not as superior as his climbing skills.  So he's fantastic at getting on top of dangerous places, like the coffee table, but stinks at getting back down.  You've never seen cat-like reflexes out of a huge pregnant woman until you've seen me fly off the couch when Ben lifts his leg to climb a table.  It's just a matter of time before he's swan diving out of his crib.  I don't even want to think about it.  

Ben is slow to talk.  Real words, that is.  He's a great communicator.  Hurricane Benjamin gets the point across quite well.  Throwing a box of Xtreme Cheddar Goldfish into my lap and taking two steps back is heard loud and clear.  But words aren't coming so easy.  He babbles a lot.  I call it his Esperanto.  It's a cool sounding made-up language with sentence structure and everything, but I don't speak it.  He does refer to me as Mum, Jacob as Dad or Daddy, and the cat as Ti-ti.  His name is Toby, and we call him Kiki, so I guess that's Ben's way of bringing the two together.  We refer to the dogs as the doggies, but Ben calls them Ah-dees.  He's reversed the syllables and dropped the "g".  Who needs the "g" anyway?  So at around 5:00 every evening, Ben starts flapping his arms and running for the door yelling, Ah-dee, Ah-dee, because he knows it's time to feed them.  Another one of his favorite activities.  While the dogs eat, Ben sits on the floor between them and watches.  Luckily, they don't mind.  But back to the language thing - Ben feels like expressing himself in ways other than spoken word.  A conversation yet to be had between us and the doctor, but halfway anticipating a referral to a speech therapist.  Other things seem to be coming together well, however, so we're not sweating it too much.  Ben has his own schedule for getting things done, and has taught us in the past to just be patient.

So that's the last 4 months, in a nutshell.  My little guy is having a blast, enjoying summer, and has no idea that his world is about to change.  4 months from now, he'll be a big brother, and we're pretty sure he's going to love it.  

Benny in Twenty-Tenny!

February: Playing around in my room:

We have lots of catching up to do!  We're in a whole new year with Benny and haven't even talked about November yet!  For the record, it was a rather uneventful month, if you take perpetual sickness out of the equation.  When Ben started school in September, he started catching little bugs and bringing them home for all of us to experience.  Most of them were little 24 hour bugs that would be more of an annoyance than anything, but we continued to function.  Until fall.  Ben's classmates were so kind that they shared the beloved H1N1 flu with he and I, so we were fairly pitiful for 8 days.  He and I barely got out of bed in the mornings, ran fevers for days on end, and were generally miserable sights to be seen.  Two weeks later, someone at school shared the lovely, generic stomach virus with us.  Concidentially the same week that our septic tank broke down and we had no use of our washing machine.  I've never hand washed so many clothes and linens in my life!  It was an exciting time in the Turner household. 

However, the light at the end of the sickness tunnel showed long enough for Benny, Gram and Mommy to squeeze in an adventure.  The three of us willingly got into Gram's van and drove to Minneapolis, Minnesota for a quick visit with Auntie M.  To back up some, Auntie M moved to North Dakota in search of employment the month before.  She had been working it up there long enough to feel homesick and want her dog back, so we saved the day and brought a little bit of home... and her dog, to her.  We decided on meeting in Minneapolis because let's face it, North Dakota isn't a tourist attraction, and it was several hours further in the car.  Out of all of us, Ben was the most mature traveler.  He barely made a peep in his 45 hour round trip across the Mississippi and back, and charmed every mid-westerner he met.  To pass the time that Saturday, we ventured over to the Mall of America in Minneapolis for a day of shopping and fun, and Ben rode quietly in his baby carrier the whole time.  He digs Minneapolis. 

November: Driving somewhere in Wisconsin:

Proof we were all there:

Thanksgiving and Christmas came and went, as did the various sicknesses Ben caught at school.  We celebrated Thanksgiving at Grammie and Grandpa's house and watched in shock and awe as Ben ate more food than anyone else did.  We determined that he is the only Turner that eats cranberry and actually likes it.  He is also a fan of helping himself to the cheese and shrimp trays and eating with manners.  Christmas was also at Grammie and Grandpas.  And Turner Place.  And the mountain house.  It was a three day celebration of gifts Ben refused to open, bows to unravel and throw, and more food to eat.  He did all three really, really well.  All while battling another bug with a low grade fever and runny nose to boot.  What a multitasker!  The combination of being sick, enduring the holiday season, and doing it all with a smile caused The Turners as a whole to retreat back home and do what they love best - sleep and enjoy the quiet.

Christmas: Pretending to open presents:

Christmas: Jack in the Box with Poo:

So two thousand and ten, or twenty-ten (depending on who you ask, and whether or not you want to be correct) arrived with a bang, as new years tend to do.  The Turners actually saw the ball drop this year, which was a stark contrast from last year where we were all asleep by 10:30, but awake again at 1:00 for a feeding.  Ben didn't make it for the long haul, but because we were bored and missing Ben, we woke him up at midnight to show him Dick Clark's celebration on TV and give him a taste of champagne.  He was unimpressed and back asleep in 5 minutes.  Go figure.  But we marked a moment and took funny pictures.

Happy New Year, Ben!

January offered the promise of no viruses, germs or sickness and helped us regain our strength and recharge from the holidays.  A truly uneventful month, as we mostly did our routines of school and work when Mother Nature allowed, and relaxed.  To back up again, Mother Nature has had quite the sense of humor this winter.  She thought it would be super funny to dump a bunch of snow in places that don't normally get snow, for amusement and laughs.  We got a big snowfall on December 18th that measured a cool 8 inches in our driveway, and about 17 just north of Turner Place, in Asheville.  To clarify to our midwestern friends, 8 inches is unmanageable in the south.  We do not know how to navigate 2 inches of snow.  8 is unreasonable.  To make it extremely hilarious, 8 inches of snowfall happened almost every Friday.  To present time, in fact.  We have had a white blanket of snow in our yard for two months and counting.  This means that school and work have been a treat when they happen, because they are usually cancelled.  It has resulted in a lot of playing and being creative indoors.  Ben has watched a lot of one DVD in particular during this time - Yo Gabba Gabba: Family.  He is mesmerized by it.  Yo Gabba Gabba is a group of 5 ridiculous monster-type characters that engage in events like Dancey Dance time, and The Super Music Friends Show.  They are apparently the toys of a tall, skinny dude in an orange jumpsuit and fuzzy hat named DJ Lance Rock.  He takes them out of a box shaped like a boombox and brings them to life by exclaiming "Yo Gabba Gabba".  As a fun fact, this show was actually created by a member of a ridiculous 90's ska band that my friends and I liked because they dressed up like bats and danced around the stage.  Their children's show is not much unlike that.  Jacob and I feel hypnotized after watching bits and pieces and wonder what it is doing to our child, but are equally pleased that it can capture his attention long enough to make dinner and clean the litter box.  Ben's favorite character from Yo Gabba Gabba is a big pink tulip shaped monster with a daisy on her head named Foofa.  Foofa talks in a high-pitched voice and offers encouragement to the other monsters and general observations about how beautiful things are.  He has his own Foofa doll that talks to him and tells him how amazing he is.  He carries her all around the house, slow dances with her, and gives her kisses when no one is looking.  If you notice he is doing any of  these things and point it out to him, he hurls Foofa across the room and yells, like he is embarrassed.  The second you turn your head, however, he will retrieve Foofa, hug her, and apologize secretly.  I can't wait to present this information to his future girlfriends and football teammates.

Christmas: Oh look, a white Christmas:

December: Still having a sense of humor about it:

Me and Mom at the Grove Park Inn - Enjoying the snowy view:

January: Ben and Foofa - A love affair only understood by them:

The end of January brought a very exciting development in Ben's life: walking by himself!  We were secretly wondering if he would ever walk because he was pushing 15 months and made no attempts whatsoever.  I was already contemplating adaptive equipment and years of physical therapy for the one child who didn't walk, not because he couldn't, but because he refused to.  But as Ben likes to do, he surprised us one day with a quick walk from Daddy to Mommy.  A few hours later, from Daddy to the sofa.  A day after that, from the sofa to the fireplace.  And within a week, he wasn't crawling anymore.  His first steps happened on January 31st and therefore at 14 months, so when I presented the idea to his pediatrician that he was technically 14 months at the time, he accepted it.  So it finally happened.  And we are not as regretful about it as many people suggested we would be.  We heard several comments to the tune of "the day he walks will be the best day and the worst day of your life".  So far, it's been like him crawling, only taller.  He is still very adventurous about exploring his environment, but doesn't have the destructor gene.  He mostly toddles around the house like a Tryannosaurus Rex (little arms curled up at his chest), looking at stuff and babbling.

February: Showing off my new skills:

February has been an extention of January, so nothing terribly exciting to note.  Ben continues to toddle and explore, talk as if he has a perpetual audience and important messages to convey and is still obsessed with Foofa and Yo Gabba Gabba.  In the last few months, he's gotten very interactive and has finally picked up on things we've been pushing on him for months.  He can now wave "bye bye" when he feels like it, and does it to the cat when his claws are out or to a meal he doesn't like.  His "hello" wave looks like Hitler's pose, or the Indian statue in front of the Cadillac dealership in Asheville.  He does this one when he is doing something he isn't supposed to and we ask him to stop, as if to politely acknowledge our attention, but disagree with our sentiment.  Or when he's actually saying hello.  He gives hugs and kisses on command in a modified Benny sort of way (hugs are his head laying on your shoulder and kisses are open mouth slobbers against your cheek).  He knows his toys and will grab the one you are talking about, again, if he feels like it, and is following general commands if the spirit moves him.  He's still babbling lots using variations of the word, "Dad".  Dad has definitely been assigned to Jacob as he exclaims "DaDD-ie" when he comes home from work, but other things can also be Dad, Dadda, DaDD-ie, etc.  He knows I'm Mom and laughs about it when I remind him (trying to get him to say it), but will only occassionally call me "Mumm".  Concidentially, Mumm is also reserved for something he renders delicious.  His best friend is a pink stuffed monster and his cat, Toby, who is velcroed to his side during waking hours.  He is doing great in school and appears to be one of the more laid back kids in class right now.  Sometimes I'll arrive early for pick up and watch him interact through the classroom windows and he's always smiling and playing quietly, or interacting gently.  We've been disease free for nearly two months now and enjoying life without snot and throw up and it's been fabulous.  We're going for a longer streak than two months, and with spring on its way, we may very well get it!

So to revisit third grade paragraph structure: In conclusion, that wraps up the last 4 months in a nutshell.  Ben is awesome, hilarious, and changing daily.  He is officially a toddler and no longer a baby and this is sad and wonderful news all at the same time.  Excited for his next milestones, but completely enjoying this stage as well!

1 Benny Boo Bear Year

Ben and Mom and a cornfield: September 27th, 2009

The fall has been all about birthdays.  We've celebrated several, including 3 firsts, and have been on the go from here to there to spend time with our loved ones putting another year behind them and looking forward to many, many more.  The first birthday party was Levi's, which was at the Asheville Pizza Company.  Ben played arcade games, hung out with Mommy's old friends, and watched Levi smear orange icing all over his face, hair, chest and so on.  Ben looked on in horror while Levi was in heaven.  The next party was in Atlanta the day before this picture was taken and was Jack Oliver's party.  He was introduced to Yo Gabba Gabba and DJ Lance Rock and played with a billion toys and other kids while Jack enjoyed his celebration.  Ben looked on in horror again while Jack ate his entire smash cake in quite a different fashion from Levi, leaving hardly anything and not making too much of a mess.  The kid is my hero.  Ben loved spending time with his bros and getting a preview for what was to come later in the season.  Mom got more and more anxious with each party because she realized each one symbolized the birth of these children and Ben's day wasn't far behind.  The Turners traveled to the mountains in mid October for Aunt Nette's birthday party and spent a relaxing weekend in our favorite place, lounging around with relatives and exploring the mountain and it's beautiful fall foliage.  Aunt Nette was very happy to see Ben and the feeling was mutual, because he knows Aunt Nette loves him the best.

Over the course of September and October, Ben decided it would be a good time to ditch that baby creeping thing and get up on his knees for some good old fashioned crawling, and continues to do so with extreme speed and precision.  He crawls laps around and around the house, usually not disturbing a thing as he moves, but getting a great workout and keeping himself occupied in a Mom-Approved sort of way.  He tried so hard to pull up on furniture and would get halfway there before falling down on his butt and shaking it off.  He finally figured that move out this week and has been pulling up on any piece of furniture he can get his hands on, followed by a quick look behind him, smiling in anticipation of his cheerleaders (AKA: Mom and Dad) yelling "Biggest One!" and clapping.  Benny has an electric smile that lights up any room, is highly contagious and flashes it almost constantly.  It is impossible to be sad or angry as long as he's near - it's a proven fact.  Ben is also expanding his vocabulary and is now exclaiming "DaDDDD-ay" and "a-BoBB" along with his already acquired mamas and babas and such.  Everyone and everything is "a-BoBB" and "DaDDDD-ay" is reserved for the father formerly known as Bob.  I'm not sure when he'll start saying actual words but I'm thinking it won't be long now.  In fact, today, he said over and over again with authority "E-gee-ahh-di" and my mom had to double check Google to make sure he didn't pick up some Italian somewhere when we weren't looking.  He was serious every time he said it, furrowing his brow and yelling it like a command.  Big Ben is nearly 22 pounds, about 30 inches, and full of new tricks and smiles.

October brought reds, yellows, golds and browns to the mountain landscape and a bit of cool air to break up mild and balmy days.  It also brought plans for Ben's birthday party, which happened on Halloween, just as Mommy predicted the year before.  Ben's birthday party brought a house full of friends and family who love Benny and wanted to share his special day with him. Everyone had a blast, packed in like sardines, watching kids in costumes tear the house apart and prove to The Turners that our house isn't baby-proofed after all.  This point was driven home when Jack's mom, Danielle brought me a cup of picture hangers and nails from the top of a bookcase while Jack was quickly darting to the kitchen to get in a cabinet and dump Comet cleaner all over the floor.  This is definitely new territory, as Ben minds his own business as he runs laps around the house, occasionally unplugging something before moving on.  So in his house were a bunch of hovering parents, a mischievous Batman, a waddling Hotdog, a very upset Pumpkin (Benny) and an adorable Ladybug mixed in with others watching the madness ensue.  Ben's birthday cake moment was met with an unanticipated scream when he realized he couldn't shake the icing off of his hands.  Instead of diving into the cake, Ben screamed and threw a fit until his hands were clean.  He refused to give the cake a second chance and even had the same reaction the next day when it was presented again.  Once Ben loosened up, he had an awesome time and the day was a blur as The Turners made their way through the party, chatting and thanking everyone for coming and celebrating Ben's day.

The next day, Ben and the complete Turner package set out for the apple orchard to have a day of fun but were met with overcast skies, a fairly empty parking lot, and quiet where bustling crowds, music, rides and fun were the week prior.  Harvest season is winding down and Hendersonville's apple orchards are selling their last pecks and bushels before closing for the year.  The Turners roamed the property anyway and took advantage of one last photo opportunity before parting ways till next time.  Mom, Dad and Ben headed down the road for a birthday party with Grammie and Grandpa and opened presents, ate lunch, and took a very long, and well deserved nap.  Ben's actual birthday, November 1st has been quiet, peaceful and full of reflection over the last 365 days.  It's been bittersweet for Mom, who has chased down every moment since Ben's birth and tried to make it last forever.  The days are so short and are coming at us at warp speed and I wish we could just call a time-out sometimes to savor little moments like a mid-afternoon bottle in our arms, a goofy giggle session before bed, or a sweet cuddle in the early morning hours before he's fully awake and alert.  I remember nursing him in a football hold, clutching him with one arm and resting him on my chest for a late morning nap and I feel like it was yesterday, literally, that this was our routine.  Hard to believe that my little 8 pound baby is now speaking Italian, eating Spaghetti-O's and calling me Bob.  I feel like I will be chasing down these little memories for the rest of my life, recalling every insignificant detail and longing for days that are behind us while looking forward to the next milestone.  The only way to describe it is to call it bittersweet, and suddenly the same birthdays that I was so excited about as a child hold a new meaning from a mother's perspective.  An extremely powerful revelation indeed.  So one year later, I am sitting at home, listening to the cold wind whip around the trees outside and reflecting on an amazing year with my Boo Bear, and recalling that on this night last year I was cuddling my newborn son and imagining what life would be like.  So far, it's been amazing.  Love you Benjamin - Happy 1st Birthday!  Love, Mama